We're PUNder attack

bryanchoppertagteam:

magicalmanhattanproject:

if anyone ever calls you a slut just say ‘and yet i still won’t fuck you’ and then blow them a kiss as you saunter away because that’s the closest they’re ever gonna get to your magnificence, o smaug, chiefest and greatest of calamaties

Ladies real talk

Guy on train: I'd fuck you if you didn't have so many tattoos.
Me: *turns up music*
Guy: I said I'd fuck you if you didn't have so many tattoos!
Me: *takes off headphones* Leave. Me. Alone.
Guy: Why the fuck do you have so many tattoos?
Me:
Guy: Are you fucking deaf as well as a piece of trash?
Lady by door: Hey. Leave her alone.
Guy: Are you her trash girlfriend? Fucking dykes, all tattooed like fucking men. Disgusting waste of pussy.
Lady: *moves forward, carefully moves jacket so only I can see the badge on her belt* Are you okay?
Me: Fine. Just wish he'd go away.
Lady cop: I can make that happen.
Guy: Oh, yeah, bitch? Who the fuck are you? I'll kill you!
Lady cop: And that's what I was waiting for. *grabs guy, holds him against the door* Harassing women on the train was enough, but you just threatened a cop. You're battin' a thousand tonight.
Entire train: *applauds*

times-like-these7:

sorelatable:

If your name is on one of these I just wanna let you know your parents are basic bitches with no creativity

image

Sounds like someone’s sad they couldn’t find their name on a coke bottle

onewomanareme:

Lets do an experiment: reblog if you would feel safer hanging out with trans women (regardless of what genitals they currently posses) than Cis women who are transphobic and deny trans women’s obvious womanhood.

cogging:

my friend told me how electricity is measured and i was like watt

youaintshitok:

Chocolate comes from cocoa, which is a tree.

That makes it a plant.

Chocolate is salad.

voldemortcanyounot:

thebabbagepatch:

fearofpop:

A guy is taking his girlfriend to prom. He waits in the ticket line for a really long time but gets them. He goes to rent a limo. The rental line is really long but he eventually does it. He goes to buy her flowers. The line at the florist is really long but eventually he gets the flowers. At prom, she asks him to go get punch. He goes to the refreshment table and there’s no punchline.

you’ve got to be kidding me

I am in physical pain

winterracial:

“DROP THE BASS” the orchestra member drops his instrument and knocks over all of the other musicians. the concert is ruined.

acomas:

my hobbies include eating and complaining that i’m getting fat

hellofromhawaii:

So I was driving behind this truck and seen this huge dog and I was like lemme take a photo of this creature, so I honked my horn a little so it would look at me and then………….

ice-cream-and-cigarettes:

achievement-hunter:

miggylol:

pumpkin spice candles soon

pumpkin lattes soon

pumpkin everything

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shinykonyta:

terreverte:

cake gifs

are you fuckin kiddin me like what kinda people just captions this ‘cake gifs’ and walks away this shit fucking put a spell on me i was unable to look away it was wild start to fucking finish that looks like REAL CAKE it looks like i can reach out and have me some god damn cake. damn son

816,683 plays

davesenpai:

sixpenceee:

forgottenxremains:

queenelsaofarenderp:

sixpenceee:

THE SPONGEBOB THEME SONG SLOWED BY 800% WILL HAUNT YOUR DREAMS

This was no joke, sweet dreams

ORIGINAL VIDEO 

NOPE BYE

HOLY SWEET JESUS YOU CAN HEAR THE CRIES OF THE PITIFUL SOULS FROM HELL

DON’T SAY I DIDN’T WARN YOU!

Don’t press play. Don’t do it man. DONT PRESS THAT BUTTON!!!!